Something extraordinary happened to Lily that morning as she stepped into the bathroom to brush her teeth before school. Suddenly her arms and legs started to tingle and the room went fuzzy. Was she about to faint?
The sensations increased until suddenly she heard a pop and felt herself drop to the floor. When she looked down she saw her body had morphed into a bright green jelly bean! W h a a a t?
In the next instant, her jelly bean body, with a mind of its own, flew up onto the edge of the toilet and plunged head first through the hole in the toilet bowl.
It all happened so fast Lily didn’t have time to be scared or grossed out, and found herself actually enjoying the slide. It carried her down, down, down, until finally the tunnel spit her out onto a soft green patch of grass. She skidded to a stop on her jelly bean bum, caught her breath then looked around. No animals, no other people, and no other jelly beans!
Either she was dreaming or there was some kind of magic going on. She looked at her round green body, stick arms and legs, and was enourmously relieved she could still see. Then she tested her voice with an extended h e e l l o o o and was glad she could still talk. Then giggles took over and she settled down enough to check out her surroundings just a little more closely.
Off in the distance she spotted an enormous black-haired beast with a mouth as big as a hippopotamus. Lily smelled him coming before he was clearly in sight. As he lumbered further into view she thought how easy it would be to be swallowed whole, yet for some strange reason, Lily was still not scared.
She sat very still as the beast slowly crossed the meadow. She noticed his head hanging low and wondered if he was hurt, or maybe sad. The thought made her heart clench.
Right on cue, the beast opened his mouth wide and bellowed a cloud of the grossest breath she had ever smelled. There were gooey long globs of greeny-yellow slobber swinging off its chin, and the few teeth left seemed rotten.
It was disgusting!
Lily’s usually sensitive nose went into overdrive, and once again, she thought she might pass out. At home if her sister peeled a banana she ran from the room, and this was unimaginably worse.
Since she wasn’t afraid of the beast, Lily’s first thought was how she might help. The beast seemed to sense her kindness so continued slowly towards her. When she thought he was close enough Lily put her hand out in the stop position, and stop he did.
So far so good.
She wiggled her eybrows and gestured, trying to see what the beast needed. He seemed to understand and waved his head towards the nearby forest like he wanted her to follow.
Soon they arrived at his cave. The beast dropped down onto it’s back with such a thump it felt like an earthquake. When the walls stopped shaking Lilly peered into the beast’s mouth. She could see how infected it was. Maybe she could clean it out so the rest of his teeth might last a bit longer. How would a beast feed itself with no teeth?
What Lily didn’t know was that the beast had no friends because he smelled so rotten and was cranky all the time, and that was also why he was so sad.
Lily had an idea. She ran out of the cave to harvest branches from a mint tree she spotted on the way to the cave. In fact, now as she looked around she noticed mint trees everywhere, as big as apple trees, and they smelled heavenly.
She harvested bundles of branches with juicy fresh leaves and dragged them into the cave. One of the smaller branches might work as a tooth pick. Lily also needed water, so used all her ingenuity to collect some from the nearby stream.
While she was gathering supplies she wrapped two large mint leaves around her own mouth and nose to make a mask, just like the one her dentist wore. It made her think she was a Beast Dentist. That was hilarious!
The surgery went well but took a while. She gingerly chipped out bugs, and rot, and leftover meat, and more than once changed her mask and scrubbed her hands. Once she poked too hard and the beast’s bright purple blood spurted out all over her!
The beast trusted Lily to do whatever she needed to without budging or complaining. He wrapped a long curled claw around her waist like a seat belt so she could lean right in from her perch on his huge lower lip. Lily was so happy she had found the courage to work through this very smelly and gross job, and it kept her going.
The last steps were to squish some mint leaves and water into a paste to rub into the beast’s gums. Lily showed the beast how to swish and spit, which he did several times. Then when its beastly mouth was as clean as it could be, Lily stuffed in handfuls of mint leaves and set her own mouth to chewing so the beast would copy her. When she was all finished, Lily pointed outside to all the mint trees the beast could use to keep it’s mouth healthy and fresh all the time. Once again the beast understood, and nodded gratefully. It seemed like they could read each other’s minds.
Exhausted, Lily crawled up into the cozy crook of her new friend’s arm and the two fell fast asleep.
As sunlight beamed into the dark cave, the beast gathered Lily up, still asleep, and carried her back to the grassy patch where she appeared the day before. He hoped she would return some day. But for now he knew he would be welcomed back into the clan, and no longer lonely. He wondered if Lily had heard his bellering cries for help and vowed to pay more attention to that hillside in the future.
The beast kissed Lily lightly on the top of her hairless green noggin. Then, pressing his lips into a loose circle, blew her softly back into the hole in the hillside.
Not long after Lily arrived safely back into the toilet bowl then gasped for air as she sailed onto the tile floor and skidded to a halt. Another pop and she was back to herself again. She didn’t remember much after feeling dizzy earlier. And what was she doing on the floor soaking wet?
Right, no time! Now she needed to find some dry clothes on top of brushing her teeth. She loved Kindergarten and didn’t want to be late, so brushed quickly and more vigourously than usual. Hmmmm. She had a sense it meant something, but what?
As she left the bathroom Lily spotted a green smudge on the floor by the doorway and vaguely recalled turning into a green jelly bean. Since none of it made any sense at all, she promptly decided it must have been a dream. But still, she hoped she would have that dream again, and this time she would try her best to remember it.
The story is dedicated to Vivian and Chloe, my darling granddaughters and fellow creators of hilarous stories. This Jamma has never had so much fun!